[{"content":"Hi, I’m Kerman, a 26-year-old Cloud Engineer interested in technology and intentional living. I created this space to share the projects I’m working on, ideas about tech, and reflections on building a more focused and meaningful life. I’m curious about how technology shapes the way we think, work, and live. Outside of work, I enjoy keeping things simple. I like cooking, listening to Lo-Fi, traveling, and constantly learning something new.\nThis is where I document the process, not just the results.\nIf something resonates with you, feel free to reach out.\n","date":"12 March 2026","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/","section":"Home","summary":"","title":"Home","type":"page"},{"content":"A collection of short writeups, longer essays, and project notes.\nExpect a mix of product thoughts, technical deep dives, and personal experiments.\n","date":"12 March 2026","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/posts/","section":"Posts","summary":"","title":"Posts","type":"posts"},{"content":"","date":"12 March 2026","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/tags/reflections/","section":"Tags","summary":"","title":"Reflections","type":"tags"},{"content":"","date":"12 March 2026","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/tags/","section":"Tags","summary":"","title":"Tags","type":"tags"},{"content":"Last week, I had one of those conversations that stays with you for days. I was driving home with one of my closest friends, and we started talking deeply about life, goals, and the pressure we put on ourselves. What surprised me was this: even though we see the world in very different ways and we are walking very different paths, we still landed on the same feeling. We both want to achieve something meaningful, and we both know what it feels like to get in our own way.\nAfter reflecting on that conversation, I decided to call this problem \u0026ldquo;the vicious circle of self-deception.\u0026rdquo; For me, it works like this: when you are ambitious, you naturally chase growth, challenge, and progress. You set high standards. You want to do great work. But then reality hits. Some days you are tired. Some days your mind is noisy. Some days you simply do not have the same energy. Or simply, don\u0026rsquo;t now how to reach the destination.\nAnd instead of accepting that as part of being human, you start judging yourself. You tell yourself you are falling behind. You compare what you did today with the perfect version of yourself you imagine in your head. That gap creates frustration. Frustration turns into guilt. Guilt quietly turns into self-deception, because deep down you know what matters to you, but your actions are not matching it. As I said in my previous post, when purpose and action are not aligned, struggle shows up.\nAs people say, every problem comes with a possible solution. In my case, these last few days were less about finding a perfect system and more about finding an honest one. I realized the core issue is not \u0026ldquo;being tired\u0026rdquo; or \u0026ldquo;being lazy.\u0026rdquo; Those are normal human states. Trying to eliminate them completely is impossible and, honestly, exhausting.\nWhat is actually under my control is my response to those days. Not my mood. Not my energy level. My response.\nWhat works for me is simple: do something small, especially when things are not going as planned. On those long, uninspired days, I lower the bar but I do not disappear. I write one paragraph. I read a few pages. I test one idea. I learn one small thing. I move, even if it is slow.\nThat tiny action does two important things. First, it protects momentum. Second, it protects identity. I am still someone who shows up. And over time, that matters more than any heroic burst of productivity.\nThere is no need to force yourself into \u0026ldquo;work 15 hours a day\u0026rdquo; mode. That usually destroys motivation and makes everything feel impossible. Consistency built on realism beats intensity built on pressure.\nSo this is the reminder I am leaving here for myself, and maybe for you too: it is better to take one step every day than to run a mile once a month.\nThanks to my friend for allowing myself to have such a deep and meaningfull conversations. Let\u0026rsquo;s keep going.\n","date":"12 March 2026","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/posts/vicious-cycle-of-deception/","section":"Posts","summary":"","title":"the vicious circle of self-deception","type":"posts"},{"content":"Lately I\u0026rsquo;ve been thinking about my future goals and how I want to evolve during my career. For some reason, and not by coincidence, I\u0026rsquo;ve been dealing with the well-known \u0026ldquo;impostor syndrome.\u0026rdquo; I feel like I\u0026rsquo;m not good enough, that I don\u0026rsquo;t deserve the things I\u0026rsquo;ve achieved. This is a common feeling among high-achievers, and it\u0026rsquo;s something that I\u0026rsquo;ve been struggling with for a while.\nThe AI does not help, to be honest. Being able to use it in almost every context has made me feel that the knowledge I\u0026rsquo;ve built over the years is not as valuable as it used to be. I feel like I\u0026rsquo;m not learning anything new, and that I\u0026rsquo;m just repeating the same things over and over again. This is a dangerous mindset, and it\u0026rsquo;s something that I need to overcome. In the same way, I discovered that I\u0026rsquo;ve been relying on AI even for the simplest, most trivial tasks, even for simple decision-making. That made me realize the dependency I\u0026rsquo;ve created and how it\u0026rsquo;s affecting my ability to think critically and make decisions on my own. I need to find a balance between using AI as a tool to enhance my capabilities and not letting it take over my thinking process.\nThere’s a YouTube channel I’ve followed for a couple of years, jvscholz. His videos are not about minimalism or the simple life, but for some reason, his way of expressing himself and the way he lives has made me think about the meaning of it. I don\u0026rsquo;t want to be a minimalist, but I do want to simplify my life. I want to focus on the things that are important to me and let go of the things that are not. I want to align my purpose with my actions and not let the fear of missing out or the need for validation from others dictate my choices.\nBut which purpose? That\u0026rsquo;s something I\u0026rsquo;m figuring out. For example, I\u0026rsquo;ve always wanted to have some kind of webpage for myself, where I can share my thoughts and ideas with the world. But I never took the time to do it, because I was afraid of what others would think, or because I didn\u0026rsquo;t know where to start, or even worse, looking for the most efficient framework, programming language, or hosting service (well-known paralysis by analysis). But now, I\u0026rsquo;m trying to overcome that fear and the need for perfection and calculation, and just start doing it. I want to share my thoughts and ideas with the world and see where it takes me.\nI don\u0026rsquo;t know, maybe it has to do with the fact that now I live on my own, and I have to take care of myself and the ones I care about. Maybe it\u0026rsquo;s just a phase, but I feel like I\u0026rsquo;m in a transition period, and I\u0026rsquo;m trying to figure out who I am and what I want to do with my life. I\u0026rsquo;m not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing, but I\u0026rsquo;m trying to embrace it and see where it takes me.\n","date":"19 February 2026","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/posts/aligning-purpose-with-actions/","section":"Posts","summary":"Hi to you all","title":"aligning purpose with actions","type":"posts"},{"content":"","date":"10 February 2026","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/articles/","section":"Articles","summary":"","title":"Articles","type":"articles"},{"content":"","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/authors/","section":"Authors","summary":"","title":"Authors","type":"authors"},{"content":"","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/tags/azure/","section":"Tags","summary":"","title":"Azure","type":"tags"},{"content":"","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/categories/","section":"Categories","summary":"","title":"Categories","type":"categories"},{"content":"","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/tags/cloud/","section":"Tags","summary":"","title":"Cloud","type":"tags"},{"content":"","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/tags/containers/","section":"Tags","summary":"","title":"Containers","type":"tags"},{"content":"","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/tags/devops/","section":"Tags","summary":"","title":"DevOps","type":"tags"},{"content":"","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/tags/docker/","section":"Tags","summary":"","title":"Docker","type":"tags"},{"content":"","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/tags/kubernetes/","section":"Tags","summary":"","title":"Kubernetes","type":"tags"},{"content":"","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/tags/linux/","section":"Tags","summary":"","title":"Linux","type":"tags"},{"content":"","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/tags/platform/","section":"Tags","summary":"","title":"Platform","type":"tags"},{"content":"","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/tags/security/","section":"Tags","summary":"","title":"Security","type":"tags"},{"content":"","externalUrl":null,"permalink":"/series/","section":"Series","summary":"","title":"Series","type":"series"}]